Smooth Criminal

I’ve always been on the right side of the law but imagine if I wasn’t. What about a mix-tape for criminals that were about to get busted? I thought it would be difficult at first but once I had a wee think I soon came up with some tracks.

“Rock Island Line” by Lonnie Donegan

This person smuggled things he shouldn’t have past a toll booth. He should have got busted for it but I don’t think they could catch him as he was on a train and it was going faster and faster. He even admitted it but that train was just too darn fast!


“Gang Bang” by Madonna

I’m pretty sure Madonna has done a lot of things she should have been busted for but surely shooting her lover in the head is something that even she can’t run away from. If they need a witness then I would have to come forward because I saw her do it at Murrayfield Stadium


“I Drove All Night” by Cyndi Lauper

Cyndi drove all night – whilst dreaming apparently, not to mention not taking any rest breaks and having a fever. Not a wise move Cyndi, if the police caught up with you then I’m sure you would have been in a whole lot of trouble. Although you’d have good company in your jail cell as Roy Orbison and Celine Dion would be your bitches!


“Your House” by Alanis Morissette

“I opened the door, without ringing the bell” – also known as “breaking and entering” Alanis – naughty, naughty. Dancing in my shower, wearing my robe and playing my Jolene CD is just a bit weird. Padded cell for Alanis please.


“Year 3000” by Busted

A mixtape called busted just wouldn’t be a busted mixtape without the band Busted. Busted rock and I’m so glad they have reformed!


What songs would you choose for this crime tape?